Monday, June 30, 2008

..KERIS 2008 in Memory..

Well... I had promised to write something on the previous weekend camp that i joined. So.. here are some of the jewels and sweet memories of the school, and the nice 'adik-adik' i met there..

the nice adik2 in my LDK group

Frankly speaking.. I was not really prepared to be a facilitator of the camp, for at first i thought that there was already enough facilitators on board. Then a day before the camp... (26th June) I got a call from a friend, asking me to help out as there was not enough facilitators to handle the students for the next day. So I agreed, for I had been facilitators for camps before. Yet, what dawned me afterwords was: no...this is going to be different. Very different from what I used to facilitate. For normally, I would facilitate camps held just for a group of teenagers who are all my parents' friends' children. This time, it would be different. To almost a hundred secondary school students from various backgrounds, in their school which i have never been to before. And admittedly, I was feeling a bit scared.

I went to the school..and discovered that the camp was quite different from what i thought it would be. I gained a lot from the camp itself, especially valuable lessons on how to approach other teenagers from different background, stand and viewpoints from that of our own.

I'll continue on with the brief summary of the camp tomorrow, insyaAllah..

Hoping to Obtain...

Missing Thoughts

Browsing thru my old friendster blog, i discovered several interesting poems. So I'm reposting them here...

In the quietness of my thoughts
I reached out
and found nothing.
Patient tears flowed upon an endless crevice
burning the current's path into a deeper emotion-
Visions of material success, possessions and fame
built empty dreams upon weak ideals.
In a self-created world, my self-created world, I was surrounded
by frustration, denial and an image of who I'd become.

Recollection of parties,
of school
of life
of awards
of moments that were drawn up to reflect "living" and "achievement"
-drawn by a girl who thought she was the artist-
Are nothing more than pieces that remain dead to the conscience of my heart.

Memories of times when I thought I should be happy
I stood shuddering in shameful loneliness
letting the bitter wind of reality consume me
and yet I don't know why. . .
Feelings I see in my patchwork of faded existence seem to reveal that
Something was missing,
Is still missing
Was always missing.

I quiet myself further and try and find out why the tears
burn with shame and the Noor has disappeared from my face.
Perhaps it was never there
Perhaps I never let it into my heart
Perhaps I thought I was strong enough on my own.

"Oh Allah (swt) please forgive me,
I need You, I need Your guidance, Your forgiveness,
Your mercy. I am nothing when I fail to remember You,
I am nothing without You
. . . I am nothing at all"

taken from:

Sunday, June 29, 2008

Blog Dedicated to Palastine

Salam'alaikum to all...

Haven't posted anything here for a few days. Been busy helping out at a school nearby for a recent camp they held. I'll post something on the camp soon insyaAllah, today or perhaps latest by tomorrow.

But anyway, here is something I found while blog-hopping. A blog dedicated to writing out what is happening at Palestine now. I find the articles very moving, and views very insightful. So I hope all of you will gain benefit from it too.

the site:

Thursday, June 26, 2008

5 Things to Reflect Upon

O! You Muslims who are...

Desirous to drive large, shiny cars,
REMEMBER: You will be driven one day as a horizontal passenger.

Wild and crazy over expensive clothes,
REMEMBER: You will end up in just a 'KAFN.'

Recklessly sacrificing everything to construct beautiful homes and palatial mansions,
REMEMBER: the graveyard 'PIT' - one's real home.

Greedily devouring tasty dishes and all types of extravagant delicacies,
REMEMBER: one day YOU will be the meal for ants, worms and other insects.

Aspiring for fame, fortune, and bright lights.
REMEMBER: the awaiting darkness and loneliness in the grave.

Source: 'DEATH' by Husainiyah publication Estcourt
took it from:

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Ukhuwah is Sweet >> Spending Time Together is So Fun

Yesterday was fun!!Alhamdulillah....Jazakillah to all the makcik2 who made the outing happen. and also..thanks to them for the previous discussion session, of course.. it was a gem.. a very precious gem of the week... a week's provision for my imaan. insyaAllah, if time allows it, i will share those gems here. The works of translation and typing must be done first though.... really got to be closer to the friends in Johor. if previously we only met mostly at formal sessions, this time it is a bit different, which is nice. And u guys sure are good at playing those games..

the archery session... that was super fun. we went laughing all the way. and took a lot of pics. hope the person with the camera can send some pics to me. Though... undoubtedly my left hand is still sore from pulling the bow. Archery made me wonder... how did the sahabahs did it during the war? How did they untiringly shot arrows upon arrows, whereas i am absolutely tired by the tenth arrow i shot. and how did they manage to shoot fast moving targets as well... I did not manage to even shoot well the target circle (is that the name for it? hehehe..). I think I was enjoying myself a lot, and alhamdulillah, i even get a free game from the guy taking care of the counter. (^_^)

Bowling time was also nice. Though i was a bit sad because not all of us get to go. One car went back earlier. But the game was fun. Though yesterday i didn't really play well, but hey.. i don't mind much. Because being there with them all is fun enough.

Thank the people who made the outing possible. And thanks to those who let us 'tumpang' their cars to the mall. and thank you.. to all of you who came. and thank you, Allah... You let me meet up with those great people, and allowed me to be there with them.

To those of you entering university after this, i'll be missing you guys..
>>Ukhuwah is beautiful... if we can meet and part in the cause of Allah<<

take good care of your imaan wherever you are. Remember the jewels we had gained yesterday, and all those we gained previously. Use them well... and search for more where you are. May we still be in this path towards Him wherever we are, and remain in this path, till we meet Him, out Owner and Creator.

Uhibbukum fiLlah wa liLlah..abadan abada!!

Who wants to Be Bankrupt??? Not me!!

Muslim narrated from Abu Hurayrah (May Allah be pleased with him)that,

the Messenger of Allah (Peace be upon him), said:
"Do you know who is the one who is bankrupt?"

They said, 'The bankrupt is the one who has no money and no possessions.'

He (Peace be upon him) said,
"Among my Ummah, the one who is bankrupt is the one who will come on the Day of Resurrection with prayer and fasting and Zakah (to his credit), but he will come having insulted this one, slandered that one, consumed the wealth of this one and shed the blood of that one, and beaten that one. So they will all be given some of his hasanaat, and when his hasanaat run out, before judgment is passed, some of their sins will be taken and cast onto him, then he will be cast into the Fire."

(Muslim: , Hadith no. 2581)

Monday, June 23, 2008

In a Dilemma.....

okey... i'm back to writing, Alhamdulillah...
though i've to admit, i owe another two posts here, the 'part 2 of pearls for the holidays' and also the confession.

well... i was browsing through my my debate yahoogroup mails... and suddenly discovered these debate motions for the recent Arau tournament. and i AM very surprised....
the motions (well..some of them..)
  • That we would disallow the hijjab in all public offices
  • That we would disallow parents to reject life-saving treatment for their children on religious grounds
  • That the government would remove religion from public education
i was stunned... undoubtedly. yea.. i love debating. Because thru i, i learnt so much. And thru it, i've made many friends and grow a lot, as a person. Yet now... i am in a dilemma. Whether to continue debating or not. For suddenly, these sort of motions contradict with my principles. No, it's not just suddenly. I have been slightly feeling somewhat like this before, though not as intense.

That was during last semester's final practice camp before the AUDC at IIUM. I didn't join in the tournament for some unavoidable reason. But the practice went well at first. Everything was great. But this motion came up... " This House Believe That Cohabiting Couples Should be Protected". Yes, undoubtedly I was shocked. It was just so very immoral! from a muslim's point of view, at least. But Alhamdulillah, at the time, my team was chosen to be the opposition. So i was just on the stand that the motion cannot work. But at that point, i imagined what it would be like if I am forced to be the government. What will I say? Will I really be able to talk of something so obviously against my own belief? then afterwords, my friend got this other motion.. "This House Believe that Middle East Should Follow Western Liberal Democracy". That was how badly would i NOT want that to happen.

So i think my point is straighten out. I am in a dilemma for these types of motions, which goes against my own stand as a Muslim, and as a Da'ei. What will people say if they watch me debating, upholding something haram? What will I feel of myself? And furthermore, and what I am most scared of, what will Allah think of me?

Yes, debating is fun. Debating opens up a wide world of knowledge. I learned about world problems, get to know stuff from different views, learn about messy economics, and so much more. also not to mention amazing friends and improvements to how quick i get to come up with things, as it forces me to think on my feet. BUT... will I be able to continue after this? Will these problems be over? How may I face my team mates at collage? I truly hope i can find out the best way out of this mess. The best way to put my foot forward. so I will not disappoint myself, my friends and most importantly, Allah...

To my friends and readers.. if you have any idea at all, please drop your comments and views on the matter. I hope it caan help me sort thru things. May Allah guide us all in our way towards Him...

Ten Useless Assets

  1. Knowledge that has not been acted upon
  2. Deeds that have no sincerity or is not based on following the righteous examples of others.
  3. Money that is hoarded, as the owner neither enjoys it during this life nor obtains any reward for it in the Hereafter.
  4. The heart that is empty of love and longing for Allah, and of seeking closeness to Him.
  5. A body that does not obey and serve Allah.
  6. Love of Allah without following His orders or seeking His pleasure.
  7. Time that is not spent in expiating sins or seizing opportunities to do good.
  8. A mind that thinks about useless matters.
  9. Service to those who do not bring you closer to Allah, nor benefit you in your life.
  10. Hope and fear of whoever is under the authority of Allah and in His hand; while he cannot bring any benefit or harm to himself, nor death, nor life; nor can he resurrect himself.

"Ten Useless Matters" - Ibn ul Qayyim al Jawziyyah

||-NasyiD: RayuaN NuRani-||

a nasyeed that got me thinking a lot... where am i in His eyes?
Am i going the right way, a path towards mardhatillah, or have i gone astray?
May we all get to obtain mardhatillah and Jannah, insyaAllah...

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Pearls during The Holidays.. part 1

Alhamdulillah, after weeks of sitting around at home and vacationing here and there, yesterday, I was able to sit around with a few friends, recalling and reminding ourselves again of our aims, strategies and life, in general. Here I have decided to share some of the pearls as a reminder to us all…

Life in this world is so full of lies and traps, traps for those unaware of its dangers lurking in every corner they turn. And so few people are aware of these hazards. Those who realize the perils had to thread on carefully, as if they are on a very long road, with sharp, shattered glasses all around them. These people are clear of their destinations. Of the temporary world, just a path to get you on to the everlasting hereafter.

Verily the hereafter is better for you than the present, wherewith, u will be well pleased.

But yet, even those who are aware of this needs constant reminder. This is because the world and its riches, though temporary, are very tempting and alluring. One needs friends who are also focused on the same goal towards the hereafter to constantly remind each other from falling down.

>> Reality Strikes

Today’s reality is a threat to our personal development towards everlasting happiness. Now, the fitrah (human nature) for doing good deeds is not normal anymore. The norm now is the opposite, everything jahiliyyah is normal, while those doing good is not. A simple example is, inside universities… you’ll be seen as a weirdo if you say “Assalamualaikum” first, instead of “Hi!” to your course mates or friends. But no one minds if people greet each other in, “Weh, how’re things?” Choosing to follow Islam is now ‘un-cool’, for it is just not the ‘in’ thing to do. A very sad reality indeed.

‘Reality bites’,
so they say… yes, now it does. These phenomenon and everyday occurrences are getting worse. It relates back to not only greetings, but also the friends we make, things we do, and what our principles are. Which is very dangerous. For this leads to many social ills and may even cause people to slip out of this deen, in other words, murtad. When the jahiliyyah becomes a norm, couples, clubs and social outings become common. Those who went to masjids become aliens.

What about principles, you may ask. Well, more and more people are caught up with the fun lifestyle, and end up thinking, “life is short, so enjoy it!” What happens to our life in the next world then? Yes, life is short, extremely short, so… why should we want to enjoy so much of it? The next life is so much longer. We are going to live there forever. Should we compromise this life for enjoyment, if the next will be so very painful? Should we spend our time in happiness here, for a few short hours in clubs, or telling the latest juicy gossips, and compromise a lifetime of pain in the next world? The time will come, for sure. All of us will die, some way or other. We die regardless of age and time. Some die young, while others old. Let us not die, and face Allah with actions which will cause us to regret. For the punishment we face there, is not something light. It is not just a pinch on the arm, nor a punch in the eye. Fire is what you’ll get, for those short, so called enjoyable minute. Nauzubillahiminzalik!

Friday, June 20, 2008

a Strong Women vs a Women of Strength

A strong woman works out every day to keep her body in shape ...
but a woman of strength kneels in prayer to keep her soul in shape.

A strong woman isn't afraid of anything...
but a woman of strength shows courage in the midst of her fear of ALLAH.

A strong woman won't let anyone get the best of her...
but a woman of strength gives the best of her own to everyone.

A strong woman makes mistakes and avoids the same in the future...
but a woman of strength realizes life's mistakes can also be Allah's blessings and capitalizes on them.

A strong woman walks sure footedly...
but a woman of strength knows Allah will catch her when she falls.

A strong woman wears the look of confidence on her face...
but a woman of strength wears grace.

A strong woman has faith that she is strong enough for the journey...
but a woman of strength has faith that it is in the journey that she will become strong.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

..: Nafs vs Iman - Who is Winning??:..

Haven’t been writing any entries for a while…

I mean, real entries, not just a bit here and there, nor forwarded ones or from other people…

Hoping to write something tomorrow, yes, alhamdulillah, I have something to share… but I’m feeling too tired today to type them up now. Today has been a busy day for me, one that is full of self reflections of the past few weeks of my life. Yea, I'll share what gemstones i have found today from those around me here, insyaAllah tomorrow.

a confession: I’ve done something I should not have, and really regretting them now… but I’m not ready to write them down here. I’ve to try and improve first. Repent and let go. Hope that Allah will forgive me or the mistake I did. Thank You Allah, for friends that care and help me see my wrongs. Thank You also for not taking me deeper into the mess I’ve made. And thank You for making me realize that what I did was WRONG, and giving me this strength to stop before I did anything more foolish.

I’ll write the experience in here, insyaAllah, when I’m ready… but the time may not be today, nor tomorrow. One day soon, hopefully. But thank you, to all my friends out there, virtual ones and real ones, who have prayed for me as their sister in Islam, and also for all of those who had thought me what it meant to be a Muslim, and the face of nafs, jahiliyyah and syaitan.

May Allah’s light always glow inside our hearts, insyaAllah…

....groWinG pAins....

Growing up…


As times past by,

As minutes become hours,

And the hours turn to days… and finally years…

With time, comes responsibility

With age comes complications and commitments

Of hopes and fears…

Those dearest to us

Hoping to make them happy

Yet… not knowing if we’re ready

To take on the challenge

To be the best

To make them proud

Oh Allah…

Help me get through with all life’s challenges ahead

Help me to please those dearest to me

Make me better, as time moves on

Help me to get closer to You

Increase my love for You

Improve myself in all aspects

To gain Your Love and redha

To stand tall despite the challenges that faces me

To be able to face each day, no matter how difficult,

With a smile and praise to You

And dear Lord…

Thank you….

For lighting up my heart

For guiding my path

Do not turn our hearts away from this deen

Please… don’t let our lives be carved with other hands, except your own

I beg You… if I die…

Today, or tomorrow… or years to come,

Make me die as a syaheed in upholding Islam

Or at least, as a mu’min trying to protect my faith…


Completed: 19 June 08

Friday, June 13, 2008

oBey Allah!!!

Precious moments of our LiFe

taken from an article i think we can all reflect on.. Source: Detik2 dlm kehidupan by Adil Zamani.
I've translated it from Malay... so sorry if there are any mistakes!

Every morning, the sun rises as a symbol of a new day for all of us. Each of us go through the phenomenon of the alteration of the light and the day ever since we’re born. Yet, how many of us really use each days and nights to its fullest?

How many of us are able to save ourselves from the loss at this world, and moreover the hereafter?

A person is said to be in a great loss, in a really devastating loss, if seconds past by, minutes fly by, and hours go by without any increase in our iman nor amal. Ma’rifatullah doesn’t increase despite the increase in age. Obedience to Allah does not increase, even though precious time passes by.

Dear friends,

Look at the precious seconds that had flew by. Did your iman led you to the strengthening of your ma’rifatullah, increased obedience to Allah, and mahabbatullah? It is a great loss, a really great loss in our life, if the moments that Allah had given us have not increased our ma’rifatullah, obedience and love to Him.

Does time that past by brings about increase in our iman, or its decline? There is no terminology such as ‘static’ in the development graph of iman. It is either we are undergoing an increase, or a decline.

Ibnu Qayyim al-Jauziyah had wrote: Varily Allah had designed the heart to get to know Him (ma’rifatullah), to obey His commands, and to love Him (mahabbatullah). And if these three processes are not occurring, then the heart is sick.

What is the condition of our heart? One of the reality of the someone that had gone astray is the failure to observe the heart, until a heart that is alive is weakened, sick, and in the end, it may lead to the death of the heart. If the heart is dead due to our own fault, Ibn Qayyim said, “You are a killer! You have killed your own heart.

The ‘death’ of the heart may not be felt by its owner, unless by the will of Allah, the arRahman. No, the death of the heart will not stop the increase of age. Physically, life still go on, but the heart had stopped functioning. This is death, even before the last breathe had been taken!

Dearest friends and future hope of Islam,

Be scared of the day when the heart is dead, but you are not aware of it. Your body will just be a ‘grave’ which had a ‘dead heart’ inside it.

Be worried of the day when you put up your hands, but Allah refuses to help you again!

Let us look carefully at the precious times we have had. Let us think of the condition of our hearts. Let us not let the precious seconds tick by, without bringing any good at all to us.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Surfin... the world wide web

I've been online quite often now..
thanx to the new modem, plus the long holidays
but what i've discovered..
the web can be quite dangerous.

yeah.. sure, the internet contains a wealth of knowledge. it can be a source of entertainment as well, when u're stressed out. but, for me.. well.. for now, it's quite hard to control my time. the net have taken a lot of my time.

time.. is precious. it is life. that's what Islam teach us. Allah had even written a whole surah on that matter, time.
"By Al-'Asr (the time). Verily, man is in loss, Except those who believe and do righteous good deeds, and recommend one another to the truth , and recommend one another to patience (for the sufferings, harms, and injuries which one may encounter in Allâh's Cause during preaching His religion of Islâmic Monotheism or Jihâd). " (al-Asr: 1-3)

time.. if we don't use it well, we'll regret it later on. when in the yaumul qiamah (the Day of Judgement) Allah will question us.. of our free time, how we spend it? of our youth, what have we done with it? of our healthy times, did we make use of it?... how will we answer all the questions? can we get past the questions and enter Jannah? will Allah accept our deeds? have we spend our time wisely, doing what Allah like?

Yes... i'm scared. afraid that these last few days in front of the computer will be asked.
and insyaAllah.. hopefully, today will be the last day i wast time this much. i've to control my time here.. though.. i know it will be hard to do so initially, i've to try... and fight the urge. limit my time, maybe to one or two hours only.

For my friends... please make a du'aa that i can manage to do it, okey.. and make use of the time online for good things that Allah allow only...

and thanx.. for reading my rantings here. may Allah forgive us all, and put us all in his Jannah together..

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Through the Looking Glass

Taken from...

We look at it everyday..sometimes even every hour of our lives..

We stare at it long and hard...trying to make sense of what we see..

but..What can we see through the looking glass?

Do we see ourselves as we are? or we see someone else who's trying to be us?

I have always wonder when looking at myself in the mirror. Sometimes I think, is this what I people to see of me? I try to feel satisfied of what I see. Try to feel proud of what I see. Feeling of confidence and self-satisfied will bring you far. Confidence in oneself will show in our character. But, feeling of over self-conscious with yourself like, fussing over a small pimple, dark skin complexion etc, will take a toll in your lives. You will never feel satisfied with what you have and longing for more and more.

What I hope to see of me through the looking glass is that I am becoming a better practising muslim than I am today. Me that is more brave and not afraid of practicing my rights in my religion. Me that is confident and proud of the Muslim tag that I carry. Me that love to see peace and harmony in this crazy world that I live in. Me that is strong in facing the turbulence in my live. And..

Me that is always humbling myself to Allah for His Blessing and Love.

Hope we can all see what we want to see through the looking glass and make it a reality. Not just an image in the glass...InsyaAllah.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

.:: The Prophet's Hands ::.

Words: D.Wharnsby, Z.Bhikha, Y.Islam / Melody: D.Wharnsby

Holding to the wheel, each mile closer to conclusion.
His knuckles and his strands of hair are slowly turning white.
As he studies all the lines, like highways on his hands,
he recalls how straight the road once seemed, as he is left wondering what’s right.
The paths all curve and bend, sometimes he thinks they’ll never end.
How much longer will he push on? How much more can he pretend?

The Prophet’s hands, silken smooth and soft to touch,
sometimes he needs those hands so much,
to feel them clasp his own, let him now he’s not alone.
The Prophet’s hands, If they could take over the reigns,
if they could take away the strains,
guide him to the end with the patience of a friend.
Oh Allah, sometimes he needs the prophet’s hands.

Stepping out to work each day, come whatever weather.
Father of the house he holds worry in his hands.
While she stays home left all alone, hands warn from too much ironing,
T.V. churns out but to know but hardly understands.
They greet but hardly meet, upon an endless dead-end street,
while children break the stormy silence of the palms raised in defeat.

The Prophet’s hands, silken smooth and soft to touch,
sometimes they need those hands so much,
to feel them clasp their own, let them know they’re not alone.
The Prophet’s hands, can bind husband and wife,
remind them why they share a life,
clasp them both upon his heart, gently help them make a start
to hold each other as they’d hold the Prophet’s hands.

Standing in the market square, so alive but void of life.
We work and we sweat and we struggle through each day.
As our efforts scar our hands, this world stains us with demands.
It’s hard to see life’s humour in the business games we play.
As we gnaw our nails with stress, our fists and hearts pound so carelessly.
With every effort forward, how much more can we digress?

The Prophet’s hands, silken smooth and soft to touch,
sometimes we needs those hands so much,
to feel them clasp our own, let us know we’re not alone.
The Prophet’s hands, as we toil in the square, come up behind us unaware.
Playful palms across our eyes, teasing to help us realize,
We need the jesting, joking, calming Prophet’s hands.

The Prophet’s hands,
silken smooth and soft to touch
sometimes we needs those hands so much,
to feel them clasp our own and let us know we’re not alone.
The Prophet’s hands, If they could take over the reigns,
if they could take away the strains,
guide us to the end with the patience of a friend.

Oh Allah, sometimes we need the Prophet’s hands.
Oh Allah, sometimes we need the Prophet’s hands.
Oh Allah, sometimes we miss the Prophet’s hands.