These few days had been a struggle. A struggle for me to study and keep pushing myself to the maximum limit. Yesterday, I guess, I was tired. I was unable to focus at all. Frustrated tears were streaming down my face as I lie down to sleep, praying that today my drive to study would climb up again. Hence I try to write this today, with the hope to motivate myself, get myself to gain the momentum to study again.
The study week… for some students, this is the time to do last minute study. For others, it is just a time to do some revision. For me, perhaps it is a little bit of both. A time to complete missing personal notes and commit everything to memory.
Searching for some self-motivations, I seek Him and prayed for strength, for ease of mind, and purity if heart. I am afraid that the knowledge did not enter my mind due to the many sins I had committed in the past. I try to refocus back on my aim to study, for myself, my parents, for the society, and most importantly for Allah.
I fell asleep last night with my mind pondering all these… Alhamdulillah, waking up, I felt more focused and more motivated to study. And I suddenly remembered a nasyeed I used to sing a long time ago, at grade 6 (as a theme song for our UPSR that year)
Ummat Islam harus cemerlang
Hari ini mesti lebih baik dari semalam..
Jangan buang masa
Siapa kata kita tidak boleh
Kita ada Allah maha Kuasa
Kita punya kuasa tenaga
Doa sebagai senjata....
Then I smiled to myself,”Yes, I am a Muslim... I can do this, with Your help, InsyaAllah…”
Thank you Allah…
Thanks to the memories…
To my parents who have always prayed and motivated me on
To the teachers and murabbi who thought me of life
To friends who are always there to remind me, and push me foreword…
Please pray for me… 1st paper is at 3rd November…
**this may be my last post until the exams are over… but who knows, maybe if I have something to write out, I will. Wallahu’alam…